Sermon

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Forgiveness

 

Which is the greater sin: to sin against God or to sin against another human being?  Most people would probably answer that the sin against God is the greater sin.  The correct answer is a sin against a human being is a sin against God.  The word “sin”, in Greek “Amartia” means “to miss the mark.”  As if you are aiming at a target, you throw your object or shoot you arrow and you miss the target.  That is one definition for sin—to miss the mark that God wants us to hit.  But what is the target?  What is it that God wants us to aim for?  The greatest commandments that God has given us require us to love God and to love our neighbor.  So the target we are aiming for is love.  And so sin is not just missing the mark, but sin is also more simply defined as failure to love.  Failure to love is manifested in sins that are against God and against other people.  All sin is of the same weight—there are no mortal sins, or seven deadly sins, in the Orthodox Church.  So when we sin against another person, we are sinning against God as well.

 

When we sin, we turn our back on God, we fail to follow God’s Commandments and we fail to love as God taught us to love.  The wages of sin is death, according to Saint Paul.  The consequence of sin is estrangement from God.  If a person sins one time, then that person is a sinner.  We’ve all sinned, many more times than one time.  So that we don’t despair and feel hopeless, God has given us the gift of forgiveness.  Forgiveness is where we overlook the shortcomings of others.  God’s forgiveness is where God overlooks our shortcomings.  God’s forgiveness is called absolution, a complete blotting out of sin from our personal record.  Not only is a sin forgiven, but it is as if the sin never occurred.  And absolution is only possible through God’s grace and through our repentance, our pledge to change our sinful ways.

 

This morning’s Gospel lesson is a parable about forgiveness.  In the verses before this morning’s Gospel begins, Peter comes up to Jesus and asks Him “How often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him?  Up to seven times?  Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.  A quick calculation tells us that seventy times seven is 490 times.  That’s a lot of forgiveness.

 

Jesus then begins to tell a parable that compares the kingdom of heaven to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants.  One servant was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents.  Ten thousand talents was a sum of money greater than the man could earn in his lifetime—it was an impossible debt to pay off.  And when the man was not able to pay the ten thousand talents, the master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had and that payment be made.  In other words, to pay off this debt would have forced this man and his whole family a lifetime of slavery.  The servant begged the master for forgiveness, beseeching him to have patience and the man would pay everything.  Obviously, he could not pay ten thousand talents, but he was certainly willing to work hard to do so.  The master forgave the man the entire debt. 

 

That servant went out and found one of his servants, who owed him a hundred denarii, a sum equivalent to 100 days’ wages.  The forgiven servant seized that servant by the throat and said “Pay what you owe.”  The man asked for him to be patient and he would repay the debt—he didn’t ask for forgiveness of the debt, but he asked for patience to pay the debt off.  But the man would not be patient and ordered the man to be thrown in prison until he could repay the debt, which of course would be impossible to do while in prison.  Other servants went to the master and reported what had happened.  Then the master called the first servant back and said “You wicked servant! I forgave you all of your debt because you begged me.  Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?”  And the master threw that man in jail.  The moral of the story, so with God do to each person who does not forgive his brother from his heart.

 

So, what then, is forgiveness?  Is forgiveness “a get out of jail free card” so to speak, a get off the hook card?  I do something wrong to you, I ask for forgiveness, you forgive me, then I wrong you again, I ask for forgiveness, and you see, a vicious cycle ensues.  This is not what forgiveness is.  Forgiveness is the opportunity to correct a wrong and then making a relationship whole again.  So, when one asks for forgiveness, they are, in a sense, asking, “Give me the opportunity to correct the wrong I have made and make our relationship whole once again.”  So the act of asking for forgiveness is an act that requires action, and first it requires humility—it requires us to humble ourselves and recognize we have done wrong, to ask for the opportunity to correct the wrong, and the willingness to do whatever is asked of us in order to correct the wrong.  And when someone comes to us and asks for forgiveness, our obligation is to give them an opportunity to correct the wrong and once again make the relationship whole.  When someone asks for forgiveness, this requires humility not only on the part of the person asking, but the person being asked.  It requires the person being asked to put away anger and to think in a prayerful way, what can this person do in order to correct a wrong?  The motivation to forgive comes from this parable—we all sin.  We all expect God to give us forgiveness.  Therefore, we need to be ready to forgive others.  If we cannot forgive others, how can we expect God to forgive us? 

 

Some mistakes can be forgiven with a simple apology, I made an honest mistake, I will do better next time.  More serious mistakes require restitution in order for sincere forgiveness to be given.  For instance, you can’t steal $100,000 from someone and simply say “I’m sorry.”  In order for things to be made right, restitution must be made.  Probably the most difficult sins to forgive are the ones that involve a breach of trust—in fact it is easier to forgive than to trust.  We can forgive an egregious indiscretion but have a hard time trusting someone ever again.  God, however, does not require us to confide in people, only to forgive and to respect them.  There may be some breaches of trust that cannot be repaired but there should be no sins that cannot be forgiven.

As I read the parable again, neither of the servants that owed their masters money asked for forgiveness—they asked for patience while the debt was repaid.  So, as I meditate on forgiveness today, I am connecting forgiveness with patience.  When we have done something wrong, we need to ask for patience on the part of who we have wronged, so that we have an opportunity to make what was wrong right again.  And then we need to work diligently to correct the wrong.  And when we are asked for forgiveness, we too must offer patience, to give someone an opportunity to correct what was done wrong, to make restitution, to make amends.  And how many chances do we give someone to make amends—at least 490 of them.  What if a person isn’t sorry?  Well, let me answer this by examining the relationship we have with God.  We all sin against God.  When we go to God to ask forgiveness, we should be asking for the opportunity to change.  It does little good to ask for forgiveness without planning to change.  How can I ask God for something as big as His forgiveness, without offering Him something in return, an effort to make a change in my behavior?  I believe God offers not only second and third chances, but an infinite number of chances to those who sincerely try to get on the right path, even when they get off it again and again and again. 

 

Perhaps the easiest way to understand forgiveness is to examine the Lord’s Prayer—each time we say the Lord’s Prayer, we ask God to “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”  What does that mean?  It means forgive us our trespasses because we are forgiving those who trespass against us.  But more specifically it means, forgive us trespasses IN THE SAME MANNER as we forgive those who trespass against us.  Be patient with us and we will be patient with those who come to us for forgiveness.  Be as patient with us as we are willing to be with those who have wronged us and come to us asking us to be patient with them. 

 

The moral of the story is that forgiveness involves willingness to make things right and this involves patience.  When we make a mistake, we are to ask the one we have wronged to be patient with us so we can make whatever was wrong right.  And when one has wronged us, and they come to us asking for a way back, we are supposed to offer them a way back and patiently wait for them to travel that path back. 

 

One concluding thought—it’s seems that “I’m sorry” is getting harder and harder to say.  Perhaps that is because we think we won’t be forgiven, so instead of apologizing, we either lie, tell a partial truth, or find a mitigating circumstance to make our wrong somehow justifiable.  We are all guilty of this.  Perhaps if we could all be more patient with wrongdoings, it would make it easier for us to be honest when we’ve done wrong.  And when we’ve done wrong, if we could just be honest, maybe it would be easier for sincere forgiveness to be offered us.  There isn’t a day when we do not need forgiveness, or when we don’t need to forgive someone else.  That’s why in the Lord’s prayer, we pray for four things we need each day—daily bread, forgiveness of sins, to be led away from temptation, and delivered from evil.

 

The greatest sin in the world is a sin against God—and all sins are sins against God.  The greatest forgiveness in the world is the forgiveness that comes from God.  If we know that God can forgive us when we ask Him, then we have to be able to forgive those who ask us for forgiveness.  Asking for forgiveness is when we ask for patience while we make a plan to change.  Granting forgiveness is when we offer patience to offer someone a chance to start over by making a plan to change.  Sin is failure to love and missing the mark.  Repentance is making a change and working our way back towards God.  May God forgive each of us and may He give us the patience and the humility to ask one another for forgiveness when we’ve done wrong and to grant forgiveness when we are asked. Amen.